I started my job the same week I found out I was pregnant. Both changes were welcome but putting them together made me anxious. I was unsure how my new co-workers and managers would react to my news. I think once I assured everyone I was coming back after my maternity leave, they were fine. I'm lucky to work for a family-friendly company.
But I know not everyone has that same experience. A recent study shows that childless woman are more likely to get hired than moms and with an $11,000 bigger salary than their equally qualified counterparts with children, according to an article in BusinessWeek.
As if we need anything else working against us. Women already make less than men in the work place, now mothers make even less? The study even says the gap between mothers and non-mothers is larger than the one between woman and men.
There are possible explanations for some of this. Some women might take off time to be with their young children leading to less experience when they get back into the workforce. Some might not take more demanding jobs because they need flexibility.
But none of that explains why the study showed mothers who were equally qualified as childless applicants were hired less. It also doesn't explain why men with children were not penalized for being fathers.
Could it be possible that men with children are perceived as responsible while potential employers think mothers won't be as committed? I don't work 12 hours a day anymore and I do need a few more days off here and there. None of that makes me less of an employee. I work harder when I am there to prove that mothers are valuable in the workplace and so I can leave the office each day and focus on my child when I get home.
It is seems unreal that in a world where most households need two incomes to survive we as mothers are being discriminated against despite our efforts to contribute.
So what do you think? Have you ever been turned down for a job because you are a mother? Do you feel like you make less money because you are a mother?
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
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5 comments:
I hear you!
I found out I was pregnant a few days before receiving the job offer for the job I hold now (I am now 24 weeks pregnant). I don't think they knew I was already a mother (of a 1.5 year old) when they interviewed/hired me, and I know they didn't know I was pregnant (I didn't either!). I do wonder if knowing either would have made any difference.
I think I am fortunate that the place where I work seems to be relatively progressive about pregnant women and working mothers - or at least, I haven't faced anything but positive reinforcement from those few colleagues I've actually explicitly talked to about my family (and upcoming addition to it).
I realize you weren't talking about the working father/mother comparison - but on that note, I will say that the dads in all places that I've worked have approached the time they need to take with their kids with more entitlement/confidence than the moms employ (for the most part). I suspect that as women we feel we need to hide the non-work aspect of our responsibilities for fear that there will be retaliation for us having lives outside the office that can take priority. I've worked with men who simply say "staying home with a sick kid today, wish me luck!" and that's that and everyone accepts it as something he needs to do, whereas I always feel the need to communicate how I will make up for my absence and emphasize my commitment somehow.
Gut feeling, I do feel like working fathers get a lot more sympathy/respect (and probably pay) than working mothers (in general - not specific to any one place I've worked). I feel like women are seen as unable to choose between the two ("why doesn't she just stay home full time if family is so much more important to her than this place?") where as men are sometimes even praised for taking a day home with a sick kid ("awwww, what a good dad!"). Again I'm guessing and projecting - but those are the voices that I hear when I am desperately trying to figure out how I'm going to cover an early daycare pickup etc.
And don't even get me started on managing breastfeeding/pumping in an office environment. The very thought of dealing with it next year fills me with dread (last time around I worked from home so I didn't have to deal with ducking away somewhere for small chunks of the day). I think smokers probably get a lot more support for their six or seven daily smoke breaks than a nursing mother ever will - but I sincerely hope I am wrong.
I got a little off track here (sorry!) and on reflection have no feeling on whether working non-mothers are paid more than equally qualified/experienced working mothers - but boy I sure hope not. Ugh. As you said - as if we don't have enough to deal with being paid less as women!
Okay, that comment came out much longer than I thought it would - hope that's not a problem!
I'd never be able to prove it, of course, but I often wonder if my pregnancy made it easier for my former employer to decide to lay me off. I didn't tell my work until I was about 20 weeks along because I feared their reaction, and the layoff announcement came three weeks later.
And now I have been out of the workforce for a few months as I've been unable to find a job since then. I won't be able to start working again right away after my son is born, so I'll have at least a six-month blank spot on my resume. I haven't experienced it yet, but I do wonder how that's going to look to future employers.
Had I not been laid off, I would have returned to work after about eight weeks, but I fear now that this blank spot will just look like I got pregnant and decided I didn't want to work anymore. I do worry what it will be like to return to the working world as a mother.
Not a problem at all Kate! We love to hear what you have to say. I agree with you about how mothers and fathers are treated differently. When men take on 50% of the parenting workload, they are praised. But woman are just being mothers.
I work for a very un-family friendly company. There are a number of women who have left the company just since I started b/c they are penalized for needing time off. The maternity leave plan is awful, with very little compensation and no flexibility. And unless you have a great immediate boss who will help you on the sly, working from home is not an option. In fact, the only reason I have my job is b/c a woman left the company when she had her first child b/c it was not a good situation.
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