The Twoddler: Every mother's nightmare

Have you seen there is something new to make mothers who spend time away from their children feel guilty?

It's the Twoddler. Twitter for toddlers.

I am not even joking.

According to an article on cnet, the Twoddler is a toy that allows kids to tweet. It's just a prototype but it works like this:

When a child presses a certain picture for a select amount of time, software captures sensor data from the activity center and selects and sends a predefined text related to that data.

For example, when Bobby plays with Mom's picture for more than three minutes, a Twitter message will post to Bobby's personal Twitter account saying, "@mommy_bobby Bobby misses mommy and looks forward playing with her this evening" (or as the messages get more refined and personalized: "@mommy_bobby Bobby is having a temper tantrum and wants mommy home now."

Because every mom needs to know that as she is going into an important meeting or trying to concentrate. They should call the thing "Make sure mommy feels so guilty she stays home."

My response to Bobby would be:

@bobby Are you bleeding? Have internal injuries? Fever? No? I'll be there at the normal time and we will snuggle then.

Or maybe:

@bobby Mommy needs to work so you can have Tickle Me Elmo 4 Xmas. Chill w the dramatics. Be cool. We'll play 2nite.

After reading this article, it did make me think of what Peanut might tweet me. Here are some of the 140 or less character possibilities:

@notraisingbrats Please stop asking me what a doggie says. I've already told you. You should know this by now. Squirrels and kitties too.

@notraisingbrats Thanks for putting me in these flower-print pants today. The kids are making fun of me. Hope insurance covers therapy.

@notraisingbrats Can you stop packing lima beans for lunch? I'm not eating them. Ever. Take a hint. I prefer fruit snacks.

@notraisingbrats Sorry I woke you at 3 a.m. I wanted a hug. Thanks for coming in 6 times before I fell asleep. Hope you aren't too tired.

What would your kid tweet?

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You can follow my tweets here.