However ...
We have come to an impasse about his annual trip to Las Vegas with the boys. His annual trip in mid-March during March madness.
Let me break this down for you. I will give birth to our second child sometime at the end of the 2010/beginning of 2011. I will most likely be on maternity leave for eight weeks putting me back at work sometime at the end of February, possibly early March.
Sooooo ... I will be back at work less than a month when he wants to go to Vegas, leaving me with a newborn and toddler for four days while I try to work full time.
Our schedules are set up so that we use the sitter as little as possible so this would mean that the kids would have to be there for 10 plus hours each day. I could try to take off but would not feel right about it since I will have JUST come back from maternity leave.
To accomplish this with no one losing any sanity, we'd have to call in grandparents, who would probably need to take time off from work to help.
What do you think? Am I being silly by asking him not to go or is he silly for planning to go?
By the way, he OK'd this post on the condition that I tell you he had to buy his own Father's Day present a week after Father's Day. (This happened because he changed his mind about what he wanted the day before, leaving me without any ideas. In my defense, I did make sure that my parents and his mom got him something he wanted.)
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9 comments:
I think he should go. The newborn stage is the easiest to deal with - remember at that point the babe will be doing nothing but eating and sleeping. He deserves it and it will be better for both of you in the end. You would never want him to deny you of your annual girlfriend's trip. You'd appreciate and respect him that much more for encouraging you to go while he figured it all out at home.
This is coming from a mommy of three kids under the age of 5 who just returned home from a week's vacation to New England with her mother while the husband took the week off of his job and his busines so I could go. AND, we're all better for it.
Good luck in your decision!
Ooh that's a tough one. I don't know how I would feel if Aaron wanted to take a trip like that. When do you have to decide by without losing any money on the trip? Could you see how things are going after the new baby gets here and then make a decision?
For what it's worth I've already told Aaron he has to take his full two weeks of paternity leave with the next baby if he wants more kids. With Lea he only took 4 days off then went back to work.
I also told him he wasn't allowed to go to a Crew game (he and his dad have season tickets and go to almost every game together) because it was two days before my due date (although it ended up being 3 days after Lea was born). I'm a mean girlfriend.
Thumbs down on the fun-time trip. And this on the tails of thinking that your husband is probably fabulous.
We call the grandparents in (my parents who live just a few miles away but also work full-time) if T is going to work late and I'm going to be left with managing dinner and bedtime solo. I have no bloody idea how to do it by myself.
I know eventually I'll need to put on Big Girl Undies, but managing two at the end of the day and at night?---haaaaarrrrdddd.
I think you have EVERY right to protest this trip. Going back to work after a few months on maternity leave is a tough transition. You will need this fabulous, fabulous man around to make it easier. Perhaps if you frame it that way he will find it less annoying? Maybe?
we had a similar situation around the time that our 2nd was born. my husband was invited to go on a weeklong camping trip about a month into baby #2. he didn't go (his choice) but i didn't really want him to go, leaving me with a newborn & toddler. as far as i know he doesn't regret that decision at all. there will always be more trips, right?
but the newborn stage was a really difficult one for us--we just have grumpy infants who don't sleep as much as other infants. so...maybe wait to decide until after the baby is here? maybe you'll have an angel & him leaving wouldn't be a problem at all. or maybe demon spawn will arrive & be awake 20 hours out of a day?
anyway, tough decision. my vote is not to go. (sorry, michelle's husband!)
a friend of mine just took a "momcation" and her husband does the same thing. They each get a few days to do something they love-alone. It keeps their marriage and family happy. While she didn't do this 2 months after baby it still was a refresher for life.
Do you have friends close by that could pop in to help with dinner/bath time? I was going to suggest the grandparents but I'm spoiled with a mom who doesn't work and can usually visit at the drop of a hat.
I want to say let him go and do his thing. But I also know having the kids at daycare for 10 hours is not ideal! So really...I have no answers.
thumbs down, for sure. I think it would be ideal if he could still go, but not at that time. A few months later, a few months earlier, now... ?
I vote for him to sit this one out. It's just awful timing. He can go the next time.
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