Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Lone wolf

When I was about three years old, my dad went to another state for training for about six weeks. My sister would have been about seven at the time. I don't remember much except bringing my mom tissues while she cried on the phone. I'm sure she missed my dad and having someone help her with the daily duties of keeping two children alive.

Thinking of this makes me feel like a wuss for being apprehensive about the rest of the week. The husband is going on his annual mancation to Vegas (or Begas as Peanut keeps calling it. She wants to know if he will bring her a stuffed animal from Begas if she is good for momma.) He's around this morning and then I'm on my own until Sunday morning. Lone wolfing it.

Actually, that's not true. I'm on my own until Thursday night when my wonderful mother-in-law is taking the girls until Saturday evening, which is a huge, huge help to me since Fridays are always busy for me and I have a hard time getting out of work on time - something I have to do when it is my responsibility to pick up the girls. (Plus my alma mater Ohio University is playing in the Sweet 16 Friday night and I get to go out with some friends to watch it.)

So I have Wednesday evening and Thursday on my own and I'm still a bit worried. Our household is set up by 50-50 share of the load. I drop the girls off, the husband picks them up with an occasional switch. We split housework and childcare. When one person is gone, the other one has to pick up the other work and is out numbered by an opinionated preschooler and active toddler who has recently figured out how to climb onto kitchen chairs and get down the stairs on her own.

My expectations are low. Keep everyone out of the emergency room and dressed somewhat appropriately. I don't even care if they match.

In years past, I took time off and just stayed home. Last year, my mother-in-law (who did my laundry a few weeks ago when she watched the girls. Really. She's awesome) came and stayed with us because I had just returned from maternity leave. These year, I can't take time off so this is what we are doing.

I have to be honest. I didn't understand the husband's desire to do this every year. Was it really necessary? Couldn't we spend the money better? But then I realized, yes, it is necessary. He works his ass off every day both at work and home. He absolutely deserves a few days off to do whatever he wants. Plus, now I feel justified in taking a girls weekend too.


Erica said...

You can do it! Lone wolf is hard though. It's one of the reasons I quit work, uri travels a lot. He's gone now too but I ran off to stay at my moms. Even though she works, it's nice to have company in the evening.

Jessica said...

Just messing up drop off/pick up drives me nuts. I do drop off and work past the pick up cutoff, so when my husband is gone I have to take off work early.

k said...

I have found that we have turned a corner in the lone wolfing department as it no longer seems as stressful or makes me sweaty. I think it has everything to do with both kids being that much older.

T's week long trips still clean my clock because homeboy is in it to win it when he IS there, but I'm less strung out when he returns and taking solo missions to get us out of the house feel less like I'm herding cats/squirrels/feral animals.

Cupcake Mama said...

I am really impressed with your marriage. 50/50 is awesome and really admirable. Just think about the Big Easy!!