Me, in four paragraphs

Do you remember when I explained that in our house, thanks to a potty-mouthed Tinker Bell in the original book by J.M. Barrie, curse words are known as fairy words?

Well, I'm wearing cropped purple pants today, flats and a striped shirt. I have to admit, I felt a little Audrey Hepburn-esque when I put on the outfit, especially with my short hair. It's all very "Funny Face" or "Sabrina." A woman at work saw me and exclaimed, "What a little PIXIE you are!"

And not five minutes later I was telling one of my reporters not to let a source push her around. "That's BULLSHIT!" I declared.

Apparently, I am the fairy your mother warned you about.